The New age of Hedonism ..

This is an article that I came across this morning while reading The Star. It actually does sum up the lives and times of the 20-something Malaysian.

Welcome to the "fubu" era --- NO STRINGS ATTACHED !!

"A COUPLE of weeks ago, I picked up a new word, “fubu”, which, I was told, is short for f*** buddy.

A fubu is someone that you have a relationship with which is not committed, but if you want sex, he is there for you. But the fubu can be the partner of another person too. It was a gay friend who told me this and initially I thought it was common only in gay circles.

Recently I was told that fubus can be found in heterosexual circles too. I was told of 20-something girls who pick up men in clubs and, if they are in the mood, they bed them without blinking an eye. And later on, if either party is in the mood, they just call or SMS each other to fix a tryst.

And these are not the screwed-up kids from broken homes or who had suffered abuse and want to take it out against a society or system that failed them. These are well-educated young adults from good, stable middle-class families who lack nothing. They know what they want, they are aware of what they are doing, they know the consequences of sex with multiple partners such as the possibility of getting AIDS and other STDs or unwanted pregnancies (“I use protection” is the buzz phrase), but they throw caution to the wind and reach out to grab whatever that satisfies them, even if it is transient.

This is the new age in which hedonism and nihilism reign supreme. Morality has been tossed into the rear seat. Pleasure has taken over the wheel and is taking young Malaysians on a wild ride on the fast lane.

And I thought such hedonistic and amoral pursuits existed only in the West and Sex and the City.

My peers may, of course, call me a hypocrite. I confess that I am not overly proud of the hijinks (now, that’s a word from the 1980s) I was embroiled in when I was in my 20s.

But the way the fubus and good-time gals do their thing with such nonchalant abandon shocks even an old rogue like me. Perhaps I have become too conservative even as I am ageing gracefully and have become what young people these days call Ol' Skool but I grew up during a time when first there was love, then there was sex. Now there is sex, and then there is nothing.

Perhaps it is due to this age of instant gratification. We want things done NOW. We want to be satisfied NOW. And we curse the telcos and Streamyx when there is no service or when the downloading takes too long. What young folks want now is not just video on demand; it is sex on demand.

Parenting experts will tell you to instil good moral and religious values in your children from young, shower them with love and attention, spend time with them and guide them along the way to adolescence so that they will grow up to be responsible, mature and respectable adults.

Frankly, you still have to keep your fingers crossed and hope for the best because no matter how much care is taken when bringing up kids, some are bound to stray.

As a middle-aged father of three sons, the eldest of whom will soon reach puberty, I am really worried. Let me tell you about one of parenting’s worst-kept secrets – one of the greatest fears of modern parents is that their child may turn gay. Now you can add fubu to the list."